Weekly thanks

01) for continued guidance; even when I don't recognize it, I understand it when it's needed most.
02) for the love of family and friends.
03) music and words.
04) one hella night before thanksgiving...
05) loving my sister enough, to recognize that we couldn't spend thanksgiving together. She's going to school and working full time, she needed the break.
06) one hella thanksgiving.
07) hosting the youth slam on saturday, it was great!!!!
08) ideas....
09) my home is a happy one.
10) my friends are traveling, falling in and out of love, learning, climbing mountains, overcoming obstacles, and finding themselves. that's what keeps us close and our bonds strong.
11) my nephew will have a basketball tournament here in a week! i get to see him play all weekend.
12) another new poem..
13) so many that i can't memorize them all.

HELP WANTED

What do you do when your co-worker smells like fresh tampons? No, really, I mean she smells like feminine freshness everyday...
It sucks. I have made complaints to management; however, the issue is there are no workplace guidelines regarding get this "scents, smells, and noise?" So, truly we are to operate out of common courtesy and consideration.

Apparently, that's a lot to ask..

Maybe it's me. But what happened to class? I don't mean recess, math and science, but class. Social consciousness, in that your bank account does not have to necessarily match your belief and value system.

Since when, in a work environment, is it appropriate to apply SO MUCH perfume on that you can smell up an entire office, "FULL OF WOMEN". I truly believed that fragrance was a personal issue, unless of course you were trying to entice someone... And isn't suppose to at least smell good, nice, pleasant or anything remotely familiar? So, not only does it smell HORRIBLY, unless you're into the "whole feminine freshness thing" it's nothing that makes you want to get closer, arouse curiosity, or pleasure. It's stinkingly (there is no such a word I MADE IT UP) painful! Where do you purchase this mess?!? I mean, do you walk directly to the Macy's perfume counter?
"Excuse me, Ma'am, I'm interested in smelling like Playtex Security tampons, do have a fragrance similar to that?"
"Well, we have Kotex, but not Playtex. And if you're interested, we have a Generic Brand gift box, which includes lotion, shampoo and powder."
"Oh, great. Do you have anything that's smells like Charmin BIG ROLL?"
"Of course. However, we ran out of Charmin BIG ROLL this morning. We can't keep the "Don't Squeeze" on the shelf long enough. We do have Quilted Northern, though. How about this delightful bottle of Huggies?"

I mean WTF? Barf Bag cube 458b please.

I love my signature scents of DKNY Be Delicious and Delicious. I'd love to freshen up with the scent all day; HOWEVER 1) it lasts all day for me to enjoy it and 2) I can't afford to carry $_____ (to name the price would be pretentious) bottle of perfume around all day. But that's the difference between MY quality and HER bullshit. Where do you buy such cheap mess that you have to spray it 6 - 8 times a day? Like smelling that funky crap when you walked in wasn't enough, already. And to spray it at your desk, what's wrong with the restroom? Oh, I know, you can't smell it for ALL THE TOILET PAPER! (This is not for people who use Bath and Body Works, I know it's a tradition for you guys to spray all day. But YOUR SHIT SMELLS GOOD!)

Ugh... Fresh barf bag, cube 564a please. Yes, it's a different number because unless I want to 1) take sick leave for the remainder of the day (usually just after lunch), 2) work from home, they run up my cell bill calling all damn day long, or 3) go home at the end of the day I'll make everyone in my life miserable, I USUALLY have to FIND ANOTHER work area.

By the end of each day, I am nauseated, dizzy, and headachey. I have never considered smell to be that important, until I was forced to deal with this. I know it sounds petty, but to test yourself, purchase a cheap Airwick room deodorizer and sit it on your desk. You will understand pretty quick what I'm going through.

I'm thinking because she's old that she can't smell herself, but then I remember she's not much older than me. And that will make me not to far from old. Then I thought well maybe she can't smell it so she sprays more on... but that's an old people characteristic and that will make me not too far from old. So then, I'm thinking maybe it's a health issue, but I don't want to delve into what's she's trying to cover up or why there is a need for her to smell "springtime fresh" ALL FCUKING DAY.

I can deal with bad breath, even bad body odor, but the sticky, sickening, sweet, of fresh diapers, toilet paper and tampons just don't do it for me.

Please, if you read this, and can you offer any suggestions your assistance would be greatly appreciated! I've tried fabreeze, both aerosol and mist, an airwick fan, opening windows, an air purifier, and fans. The doors cannot be propped because of the fired psycho who threatened to shoot someone a couple of months... and they told me I could not wear surgical masks because it would be offensive.

How I spent the night before Thanksgiving

go shawty, it's ya birfday!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY KANGA!

a year wiser and younger

birthday on thanksgiving

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

BABY GIRL EBONY!!!!!!

so much to conquer, do it one day at a time!

HaPPy ThanKsgiving WorLd

Thanks before Thanksgiving

01) that i had a wonderful opportunity to chill and hang with a group of beautifully diverse women. to make new friends and gather with old ones. you'll never know how much it meant.
02) okay.. i am listening to kevin sandbloom's version of it is a crime on kazi.
03) okay, i get to see see kevin and anthony david tonight at the mahogany affair.
04) i get to WATCH Tje's last show (he opens the kevin and anthony david) before he blows the fck up... TRULY.
05) that my man herman is truly doing his thing... i mean, really, we've known him since skinny sahara...
06) that i have lived enough to experience the rewards of going back to me...
07) that i have friends that have hung in there long enough to experience the rewards of that growth.
08) that i finally had lunch with one of my girls... i never forget how much i miss you.
09) writing projects.
10) hosting the youth slam this weekend..
11) sorry angel... MY RUMOR!!!!!! i finally got a phone that i wanted and like!
12) for one hella card partner the other night. yes, ma'm i'm growing, so walking away was too damn easy!
13) g.o.d. for paving a way toward continued growth.

p.s. passion flavored rum soaked passion flavored cherries and pineapples. j.j.

p.p.s. the shade of my elm tree.

Make Me Stronger....

I am a Kanye West fan. Always have been. He has learned one of the most valuable marketing tools. Re-inventing and marketing yourself. Or something that our PARENTS should have taught us, if you don't toot your own horn who will. No, he is not the most prolific rapper of all times. Yes, his rhymes are basic and at times rudimentary. However, no denying he IS one of the best producers out there. Sure we were a little turned off at his "balking" and displays of poor sportsmanship. His arrogance borderlines narcissism. But HONESTLY, how many of us don't know this type dude? Or maybe, just maybe, he's created a stage persona that has nothing to do with WHO HE REALLY IS? I mean it was admirable to watch his anxiety and impulsiveness when he belted "George Bush doesn't care..." on National Television. I mean weren't we all waiting for someone, anyone to say ANYTHING? Mind you, we would have wanted to be a bit more poignant, yet.. It was what it was.

In the wake of his mother's death, I find people cruel and unrelenting as they discuss his breakdown at his concert in Paris during the intro to "Hey Momma." Most know my mom passed away before I entered kindergarten. It still hurts to this day, and I could never imagine the pain having her with me everyday during my trials and triumphs only to have her snatched during the prime of my life. So the cruel things people have said....

Most of us will never know what it's like to have hundreds if people depending on us for their livelihood. But what do we do after a death, we go try to put our lives back together. And we break down, and people, sometimes random strangers, try to support and help us through. Perhaps he went to the thing he loved most after his love for his mother. Music. Perhaps he thought it would take him away for a minute.

I say all this because I received a copy of the e-mail with the youtube attachment showing his breakdown. A woman cruelly stated he was doing it for attention, that he arrogantly wanted the crowd to chant his name, that his was exploiting his mother's death.

I believe as society we have gone too far... and we've forgotten about the frailty in our humanness. And I can really appreciate a man who has given us nothing but ONE SIDE OF A wall, to share just a bit of what it's like to be with him on the other side.

"COPA, We don't go out there to punt." Tom Brady.

I know it's a little fool hearted to play your starters longer and more than necessary. Don't agree with Coach B. I mean an injury could hurt us... A loss is prolly necessary... but for now, winning feels so good. Check out this year's co MVP. The MVP, his supplier, Tom Brady. BABY.
Tom never knew the high of crack cocaine until he his met this man...

whitney who...

I was looking back on some things and found this....

big thanks poppin

01) Thanks goodness for the discovery of antibiotics.. especially z-packs! I had an upper respiratory infection last week. YUCK!
02) Poet friends I can be jealous of... Damn, I missed out on Georgia Me.
03) Listening to a young artist who will be famous one day. Damn Tje.
04) A nurse and nap partner.... Ain't nothing like having someone play sick with you.
05) A card/domino partner that I know is as excited as I am about this Saturday night.
06) Friends I can be happy for and proud of. Ain't nothing like having the people around you making positive strides. TRULY... The blessing in it is that you can never be stuck if you are genuinely happy for them and can live vicariously through their successes until YOUR NEXT BIG THING HAPPENS..
07) Hanging with K.A. Sunday afternoon, even if I was under the weather. Not dismissing anyone else, but you know, he is my male mirror. Flaws and all.
08) Writing with him over the phone last night. Goof...
09) Shrek 3 and the Boy Child. Nothing like adolescent humor and gut wrenching laughs.
10) New Poems.....
11) Having too much on my plate that I can't memorize them fast enough...
12) Going to Ego's tonight... (maybe)
13) for G.O.D. and the things that happen just cuz.....

BONUS - Do your thing baby Girl with the HIP HOP EXPLOSION!!!!!

I was sick as heck...

but i fought through the fog and smoke.. i wasn't on the infamous syrup from a year or so ago, so with periodic coughing fits and other unimaginable little things sticking tightly to my lungs, i sat and listened to the Ladies of neo and Beyond represent. I really loved Ms. Jackson's hosting she was funny (partly most of my coughing fits were due to her) i only hope to see more of her hosting this year.. one poet in particular made her way back to the mic and not only was i floored by her words, but her courage. barely legal and deadly lethal (jono and brent) were in the house, i would have loved to sit and listen to the brainstorming for their pieces. our feature who stepped it up just in time did her thing.... my fondest moment aside from miss jackson's hosting was to watch my niecey fall in love with the mic again.... most tragic moment, but imma work on the brother was his excitement with getting a rewind. i wasn't too hard on him because i could breathe let alone talk after a hour or so into the show, but i want him to fall in love with hearing his own voice, not that of the crowd. damn, maybe that's my next piece.

Grateful nonetheless....

01) for a fantastic week and a half of poetry.. looking forward to so much more.
02) for re-connecting and reliving what NEO is all about... Yes Poet Fam.. we do real good.
03) for giddings and laughter, even though i was a bit under the weather.
04) for you being a shoulder i can cry on.... i've never forgotten how strong you really are.
05) for my best friend co-worker and her new endeavors... it hurts, but i'm so happy for you.
06) for a new poem
07) tomorrow's thursday...
08) for your love, and how it makes me feel...
09) for i.m.'s that help me more than you know.
10) for having friends to miss.... yes.. i'm talking about YOU and YOU and YOU
11) for some cleva mofo'ing poets from killeen (good competitive spirits)
12) road trips with you... and you're right i can't hang.
13) for a 16 year old's smile... am so happy he's finding it again.

bonus... for the best sister in the world...
bigger bonus... new england's win!
another bigger bonus... my grand's birthday yesterday.

Happy Birthday Grand......

me and my Grand.....
I am a boisterous river. I am a mountains story. I am a quiet feeling. I am a fragrant flower. I am a moonlit evening. I am a peaceful night. I am a writer's thinking. I am a wealth unfathomed. And if you don't recognize my presence, I am here. And if you don't recognize me, I am here.

jill scott (still here hidden track)

what more can i say.....

No words necessary...

watered prayers

She now knows its possible to see a mirage underwater.

Her tears flooded her heart leaving her full yet thirsty.

When her eyes close she can hear Momma

"Don't need nobody to make you a woman. You'll be strong when you can stand alone."

Alone she whispers.

Momma no longer here to hear the melody in her words never matched the cadence of her heart.

Timing always off.

Tunes didn't align.

Never expected this journey would be cloying.

Abundance of sentience depreciated her meter for precariousness.

Yet she is afraid of not trying.

Past through then passed thru rough terrains in affairs land.

Drowned again.

Valuables forfeited.

Lessons benighted made the voyage wayward.

Ignored the villages along the way.

Guided by hopes of a lunar wonderland.

Stars aren't that shiny.

Resisting the sweetness in her own image yet succumbed to reality.

In love with love.

Failed driving endeavors caused her to fly.

Never solo or so low the only mission.

Navigation's were random,

contingent on current

circumstance or happenstance and costly.

She makes a futile attempt

to use the chest of her soul-mate

to burrow her sorrows.

Baggage from all lifes journey to heavy.

She hears mommas voice.

She opens her eyes she is alone.

Life is still.The moon doesn't shine.

She is frantically seeking security.

Arms stretched she cries out: " Father GOD. Prince of Peace. Wonderful Counselor. I seek only thee to guide me. For I have fumbled this journey by straying from your path. I beg that you encompass my soul broken and faithful.I am your servant.I confess my love for thee and I long to hear you speaking. Oh Father, I Thank you. I come to you on bended knee. I have not had this journey alone. Whether the end be near or far ,Thy will be done.I am ready/willing/able to see. I have failed you and become lost by not loving me. AMEN"