> 24 hours and I'm thinking of a million things.....

i should be thinking of myself...
yet i'm wondering, about her. why my beautiful sister has allowed someone to blow out her flame, her spark, her luster. she will never know how beautiful she is, she will never see it. sometimes even the most beautiful things get swalled in darkenss, begins to cast shadows, and is soon lost in the ugliness of it all.
she has a radiant inner beauty, a caring soul, and a glowing spirit. a friend whom i am growing to love daily, and with fierce loyalty. a loyalty that is lacking in sisters today. she is like my meliaceae, simply a godsend, a kindred spirit, a sister who has helped me grow and see life so much differently. and i, well,
i'm blinking away clouds, fighting rainstorms, swallowing her rainbows, so that one day, my crooked grin will radiate the vibrant prism of colors that a waits her. pray that my tongue finds the words to wash away the murky waters that once flooded her mind, to release her, so that she one day, she will realize that she was really drowning, and not swimming. and that i drank rancid cups of i'm letting you down, laced with pride, love, well wishes and encouragement, praying to keep her afloat. it's the same i believe she would do for me.
and i pray on this night that despite the questions you ask of yourself, the answer is he is no different. a different weapon, but the result is still the same. your pain. your struggle with self. your loss.
if i smoked, i would light a cigarette in your honor and allow you, to watch me, watch you, burn under another's heated pressure, because he doesn't know.. that if used in the right way, his air, so much like your fire... if simply balanced could burn beautifully... and co-exist.... together
salama.....