Lost One

Pre - thanks and Giving Attitude of Gratitude List:

Lost One and 30 Something

affectionately named this week after new cuts from

Jay Z's: Kingdom Come

1. I no longer have my village, but I have a group of women whom I call friend and sister. Thanks for the lessons (good, bad, or indifferent). I list you ladies because from you I have found strength, growth, and the willingness (despite and in spite of me) to face my most fearful truths. With you, it's always about what's going on with us and catching up. How friggin' refreshing is that shyt? Brooklyn, Angel, My Girl from the Pretty Tree, Poet in Law (one of the hardest lessons this year, i swear!), and Lovie (no matter what negras, no matter what).

2. The art of spoken word. It is a gift from God not to be taken lightly. I pray that I remain grounded and humbled by this blessing. Similar to life, it could be taken away at any moment. Wish everybody thought like that. Really.

3. The strength to climb mountains, real or imagined. Honestly. The view is so much better from here.

4. Home. Man, that's all I can say. Home.

5. Prayer. Be diligent, and focused, always knowing what you're asking for. Believe me it works.

6. That I've realized I can never replace my village, so I've chopped the trees and broken the windows. I have my village's memories, that's all I will ever need.

7. Having another niece. I am honored to be referred to as your crazy aunt. It puts things in perspective, and was so truthful in that moment. Smooches.

8. You. Thanks for reminding me that I was once someone so much greater than what I put out there. You complete me.

9. That everyone and everything has a place, and the ability to recognize when I'm forcing things into place. Somethings are better off without me, and me without them. Believe that.

10. Another year in which to wish everyone a Happy Thanks and Giving season.

What makes this list special is in every one, I had to lose something in order to recognize the true blessing. In some instances it was an attitude, a thought or belief. In others, I had to change my relationship with people. A big fear, because I've realized people would rather believe they told you to kick rocks, as opposed to believing you've grown a part. This year has been most difficult, because I've really grown up and away, and I've had a lot of criticism, people who reportedly were so down for me, were.. Well, themselves. I'm not angry. Just happy that people see through lies, and that everyone gets what they deserve. Happiness. I hope you are as happy as I..

Except that fame is, the worst drug known to man. It's stronger than, heroin. When you could look in the mirror like, "There I am". And still not see, what you've become. I know I'm guilty of it too but, not like them. You lost one.

lost one.. jay z

p.s.

Happy Birthday EB! (sorry ;O( )

Happy Birth and Turkeyday Jo V.

Angel... Hope you made it safely!