Tonight, I took my first step toward total liberation. I admitted a wrong. Very difficult. As, the last few months have taught me about learning to trust. I once loved hiding behind this tough exterior, but the truth of the matter is I am as insecure and neurotic as the next. While I deal with mine, differently, it doesn't make me less human or heartless, it doesn't make me mean, it just makes me... me.
It make me, trying to do me, in the same world everyone else does them. PERIOD. I am not going to make excuses for the choices I've made. And there have been NUMEROUS MISTAKES.. I am not going to apologize for me being me.
I will apologize if I have contributed in some way to the chaos you call your life. For whomever believes I owe them an apology. Especially you.

I realize that we are two very different people with two very DIFFERENT TRUTHS. After being told not to read your blog, I did. I was told, to take the higher road and ignore it. I would if it didn't contain lies. Unless you work at the Starbuck's on 45th and Lamar, you are not being stalked. I probably own more Starbuck employee t-shirts than you, I am a regular DAILY customer. Two visits in two and a half months does not make me a stalker. It makes me smart. I don't think about you and your world, I never told a soul where you worked and had AVOIDED IT AT ALL COSTS. I cannot tell my girlfriend and her sister in law that we can't go into the Starbuck's nearest our homes because you work there. Really they could care less, and said to me after we walked out, "oh, that's why you didn't want to come?". And it is the only single standing Starbuck's closest to Plugerville. Two: I have not asked you to do anything behind my poetry. My narcissistic self knows it stands well alone. The butt-holes that wanted Trey and I to do the revised piece in front of you were being what I believe to be messy. And I said from the stage, I don't think it would be respectful to the person who originally sang on the piece. I did not ask you to come to the stage. Nor had I bothered or had a notion that you and I would do a piece again, you don't like me, and I don't like what you do. And the last person who asked you to sing on the piece was at the Neo-Soul anniversary in May. Again it was not me. And the poem that was done twice. Never said you wrote it for me, always maintained that I wrote off your piece about your ex and came up with the melody. The "talk", well, it wasn't about you. The person who told you didn't bring it to you to be messy, but you wanted it to be. You want to prove to her that somehow I'm not her friend. I'm told if you have to do that much convincing then maybe you should leave it alone. Your name wasn't mentioned. Since you want to make it your battle, when there is none to have WITH YOU..... then battle on, this time without me. Oh, and I don't have a chipped tooth, but I do have a crooked smile. It's something I learned as a child to hide what was once overcrowded teeth. And also you forgot, PRIVATE CATHOLIC EDUCATION.

You. If you ever need me. I remember what it was like before all this bullshyt and we had fun. I still look at the books and smile. And couldn't help but laugh when I saw some chocolate brown and blue plaid leather chucks. The reason above is the reason I chose to stay away. I don't want trouble. I will not be blasted every chance I get with old news... and believe the stuff she wrote about is OLD NEWS.

You: You trusted me. I'm sorry. You didn't deserve it.

You: Our friendship has changed. In my heart and mind. I want to be free of this.

You: Who I don't owe anything. Hope you got your laugh. Must have tickled you. You're still losing your personal race, simply because you cannot and will not stay in your lane.