on january 20th, i began my birthday at 8:00 am. i lay on a make shift pallet, celebrating my birthday over the phone watching Obama with carrot top, one of my closest friends. we've known each other since the 6th and 7th grade when we shared the social awkwardness of being born to the wrong parents, in the wrong city, on the wrong side of town. mind you we weren't poor, our parents weren't abusive, nor were we living in some urban plight that most made for tv series stemmed from.
we simply wanted, wished, and unlike most kids our age, knew that there was something bigger than that moment, something special that waited for us outside the gym walls of riley jr. high school.
that morning was flooded with phone calls and well wishes from friends i met along my journey in this life.
ironic, the latter part of my birthday was spent with another friend who defines me as much as carrot top. she has been closer to me than i have been to myself. she has been my conscious, and has inspired me in many ways, even SHE WILL NEVER KNOW. I just continue to grow through our unlikely, yet made in heaven friendship. she, she and i make three. and that night as i looked past the feigned courage and stared face to face with the youngest of the trios fear. i knew our lives would never be the same.
unbeknown to me, she and she made plans to celebrate my birthday with me; however, life had different plans. our fear was realized. we would later find that our rock had, yet again suit up to wage another battle. and it hurts. i hurt and am ...
well never mind. this isn't about carrot top. nor is this about her. or her. this is about me.
it wasn't the best birthday, it wasn't the worst birthday, it began and ended with who i was suppose to be with, who i needed to be with doing what i've always wanted to be. A FRIEND.
yet every day since my birthday, i have been struggling. struggling and grappling with anything and everything. daily there has been something i needed to re-evaluate and make appropriate choices. i recognized if i were to die tomorrow, i would HAVE REGRETS, and i don't want anymore!!!
Serious ones, relating to career, choices, education, places to live, how i live and love. so i invented the monkey to assist me in doing some of the things i really want to do... from now one i will live how i want, do what i want, go where i want, i will not miss an opportunity in the life to live happily.
there are too many people who would kill to exchange places with me..
in other words, i've know no walls other than those i have built...
me and the monkey are on FIYAH!!!
ps...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Adrienne Henderson
Carrot Top
I LOVE YOU, BABY SIS!!
and to you
super woman if u fly by
HAPPY DAY BEFORE IT ALL
i love u
u consider to inspire me.....
3 comments:
hugs
I think the monkey is a good idea can we name it? And can i get one?
yes. and yes.
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