The Lorax, Super Heroes and Tears....

Dr. Seuss has always been my favorite author/philosopher. I even took a trip to Springfield MA, for two reasons. 1) Basketball Hall of Fame and 2) Dr. Seuss museum. The Lorax has always been my favorite story. Conservation is of course important, but as I grew up, it meant (the story-line meant so much more). To me he spoke for things that couldn't speak for themselves. Including me. My childhood didn't afford me the luxuries of believing in the fairytales, like Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, Superheroes or God. Santa never left those skates under the tree, only that bitchass doll, board games, books, purses and dresses. The Easter Bunny caused me to wear dresses with lace that clawed through my skin like rabid ushers for the dead searching for new life forms in which to whisk back into the depths of hell. Throughout my life, I learned they either didn't exists or just weren't there for me. God, well, he snatched my mom when I was 5, and left both my Dad and Pop, paralyzed with fear, regret and substance until each awoke from their perspective hazes. One before my 7th birthday, the other during my 12th year of confinement upon this earth.
Super heroes were a little different. I believed I fit the description. I was orphaned by tragic circumstances, lived with elderly relatives, was awkward and odd to my peers, and believed my self esteem would improve "only if" (the biggest form of dishonesty, because you are lying to SELF and you actually BELIEVE IT). I believed I needed JUST the right costume, and once found, my powers would reveal themselves. Or I believed that my mom had magical powers and that one day she'd return, and I too, would live in a cave with crystal and be given another chance.... But the power nor she, ever came. Or at least I believed they didn't. Unbeknownst to me, God, my Grand, my Pops and my Dad, gave me remarkable powers I would discover later in life. One night, I watched the Star-bellied Sneetches and other Classic Stories, which was followed by The Lorax. It changed my life.... Really. The Lorax spoke for the trees ( people/things) who couldn't speak for themselves and I vowed to speak for them. I asked my grand what he (The Lorax) was and she explained it to me. I took it as The Lorax was a lawyer, and I ran with it. Immediately speaking and taking up for the under-dog, never knowing that the behavior would make me an underdog in life (ANOTHER STORY. I am often used by others to speak for them, and it contributes to personal difficulty as I look like the trouble maker/rebel rouser). My family teased me and calling me the family attorney as I grew up. Often asking me to research things as I grew up. I knew it was nothing more than to boost my self-esteem adn keep me focused.. I chose my undergradute program, believing it would grant me immediate admission to the Law program upon graduation. My focuses shifted. Actually, I always had a passion for literature and words all my life. I have always been an avid reader.

to be continued....

but I will leave you with this..... Since then God and I have forgiven each other for our individual and combined selfishness.....

thir13teen