Harlem's Transgression

My deepest wish is to turn my back on self and time to give you what you truly desire. Me. I would give back my fear and insecurity. Forget every time my heart was shattered with a simple kiss or broken promise. Learn to forgive myself for letting myself down. Remember that sometimes the best lessons are those which come from experience, but not allow those experiences, no matter how disappointing, to define me or my life. To learn to really give what I want in order to receive it in return. Learn that unconditional is just that unconditional. Not keep score. Every opportunity to forgive is an opportunity to expand our possibilities. Learn that while I speak well, and make good arguments that I am not always right. To walk away, because there are things that should never be said. Hold hands longer. Kiss even longer. Say I love you often.

Motherless hugs have left my arms heavy, my heart weary, my mind weighed, body paralyzed from anxiety, apprehension and fear. Love and life lessons which, while I try diligently to learn, leave me frustrated and wrought with failure. It is in those times, as confusing as it seems, I want you to hold me as a mother would. Comforting me, loving me, unconditionally. Yet, today, I remembered, that no matter what, you have never let go. You've not let go since that fateful rainy day when you coyly smiled at me and said, "I'm not flirting with you. People often think I'm flirting with them. They get the wrong impression." And you laughed. Thru your laughter I saw the brown of your eyes, and longed to be lost in them. One day. And by no act of my own, I am afforded the opportunity to not only get lost in your eyes, but to seek shelter in your arms...

I am learning to let go of fear and my past. And while I don't need most. I do need you. My insolence will not always allow me to let go of my foolish pride and admit it. I love you. I need you. I want you. I wish you knew how much.....