Fools Gold and Fortune Cookies

I feel like I'm going to throw up.... I managed to force down some kon po shrimp. I have been pretty shaky, with that funny hand twitch most of the morning. It didn't help that I had Komodo Dragon coffee this morning on an empty stomach. It always makes my head feel swimmy, like my blood pressure is up or something. Wait, let me start over. Last night was pretty fcked up.
New Character Introductions:
He-Bitch: exactly what it means....
Poltergeist: She's back....
Came in to an early morning staff meeting. He-Bitch is talking in that Cindy Brady lisp kind of way. I can tell he's excited about something. 'Cuz his hand is swaying back and forth in the air, and when he finally shuts the hell up, he has this dick-eating grin. The type that even the most fierce drag queen would stab him in the back of the neck with a pencil for, in other words you could tell he was up to something. Something that made you want to use the bed of his nails forcibly to claw a one way ticket to hell for his ass.
"Good morning," he says as Poltergist walks into the door. Everyone is kind of looking around 'cuz she seldom comes to meetings, especially since she's short timing. You know in that minute it's his opportunity to HARASS EVERYONE IN THE ROOM. And that is what he does for exactly one and one half hours. He even tried to pin me a few times forcing his hand into a project which I am serving as lead. Mind you He-Bitch is my equal, well we are co-workers, I am not his subordinate. A sister did her job a little too well, and in the end he said, "Excellent job," like he'd eaten a kola nut (you know I passed up on a good one don't you?) or something equally as bitter. I could give a good fck about what he thought, only cared that it would make my work life a little easier if I allowed him to live another day. Poltergist lets him get away with everything. Treating him like a pet, patting him on the head and rubbing his stomach when he does that little pesty shyt. What she doesn't know is in her absence he sat quietly in the corner and if he thought about saying something stoopid, damn near everyone in the room moved to the edge of their seat, waiting for a chance to tear into his ass. Even though I felt like I'd won today, it didn't make me feel better...
"Follow The Advice OF Your Heart" read the first fortune cookie. I don't like the way that sounds so, I reach into the bowl and take another, "You Are A Good Connoisseur Of Food And Drink". Shyt. This is indicative of my day. My chest feels like it's going to cave in. My hand has started that funny twitching thing..... And I feel like I'm going to throw up. You know that kindergarten show and tell, or upset stomach kind of throw up? Yea, that kind.
As I walked back toward my office from lunch, I had a funny analogy. Love is not like a cold, something you catch easily without warning, it's much like mining for gold. You have to be at the right place at the right time. Or all you will get is fool's gold. That shyt that looks real, but once you scratch the surface it ain't worth a damn thing. In trying to help a friend I have learned the following:
- "I love you" can be a lie, no matter how many times it is said.
- Most people want be loved in a way they could never love in return.
- If a person continuously disappoints you, they will always be a disappointment.
Fck, TOO FCKING LOUD FOR HIS SIZE just came in. He's going on and on about something. I know damn well he knows he's loud. He's like a minature bass fcking woofer, he's made me loss my train of thought... oh well..... any way to my friend... maybe it's fool's gold, keep scratching....