sunday's reminder or why there are so many single sisters....

fade2black
she, he and i are riding to the auto parts store to pick up yet another part for hip hop. he and i are discussing a mutual acquaintance and behaviors. she abruptly interrupts after what seemed like a gazillion attempts to engage her in conversation."
her: "so you know why people don't like you, huh?"
me: "uhmm, yea. it's pretty easy. i can come across a little arrogant and at times, rude, i'm often hurried or disinterested. never my intention. i do not want to offend or ostracize anyone. i prefer few words, and act quickly, yet deliberate. i'm cool with me though."
"are you?"
"yep. gotta wake up with me every morning."
"well, i can tell why they don't like you. or at least you what you did to me."
i knew it didn't have anything to do with the subject. a woman knows when another woman has a problem with her. especially when it's about her man. "what's that?" i ask, half heartedly, i knew what was next.
"you disrespected me, you don't need to brang my nigga no liquor. i can do that my damn self. also, you left my house without saying bye. i thought i ain't done nuthin for dat. you can be standoffish and shyt."
"my bad. where i come from when people under charge, you give a tip or bring a gift. he did not want to look like he was overcharging me, so don't give him too much extra. he said i gave him too much the last time, so i purchased a bottle. i didn't sit with him and drink it. i was also aware that you didn't care for him to do work outside your home, and that you didn't feel well. he insisted he could do the work, so i walked to the park and talked on the phone while i waited. as not to disturb you, or be a reminder that he was doing work outside your home. i apologize for being raised by WOLVES." i was sarcastic, but knew she'd never catch it.
"i ain't said all that shyt. and i DID drank that up with him. i just said to myself, why would she do dat. i ain't done shyt. ya know you a woman, i'm glad you let me get this off my chest. i feel better."
"good." i replied, but i knew better. she didn't see me as a woman, but a threat. i knew she was lying. she had unresolved issues that didn't have anything to do with me.
fade2black
three days later as he didn't finish the previous work.
he: "come by the house sunday. i gotcha."
me: "you sure. you know, ya girl. she doesn't care for me."
"aw man, come on by. she know this is about money."
"man the last time, i was there, well, you heard what she had to say. i thought i was appropriate."
"come around noon."
"what if i come around 1:00 that seems early. i don't want there to be a problem."
"come on, what'd i say? i gotcha."
sunday, after i waited for an hour for him to get home, he beckons me outside.
he: "i can't fix ya car. man. she's trippin'. i don't know what her problem is. man, she trippin on you. she thinks it's something going on between us?"
me: "what a car?"
he: "naw, man. you know."
me: "black, i'm cute and all." we both laugh. "but damn...."
he: "take your car to the old man's,i gotcha tomorrow."
fade2black

he and i do business. he has a woman. whom, at least within my limit eye sight he seems to be faithful. problem is, they have a history. a history of cheating. he on she. she on he. it has nothing to do with me.
if your man is a cheat, then he's a cheat. the reason he cheated is about him, not about you. you can have a million dollar __________, but if he has taste for a million and one dollar _________, yours is no longer the flavor of the moment. every woman that comes around does not notice your man, let alone want your man. especially the way you want him. matter of fact, you could possibly make the "whatdoeshehavethatmakesthisbitchsocrazyattitude' type take you up on the challenge just on g.p.. and that small percent of women who will "fckyourmanandnotgiveadamn" are easy to point out. a lot of us know a good relationship is hard to find. we respect the few that exsist. yet, out of our own insecurities and limited abilities to view each other as sisters we create a divide. no one wants anyone who is so insecure that they are willing to sabotage their livelihood. his woman and her insecurities are messing with his business. interfering with the money he's bringing into their household. *those of you that know my beloved hip hop know any good, reasonable mechanic will get me on the comeback.
not only is it destructive to her, it's destructive to the relationship. i could see the disgust and embarrassment on his face. i felt bad for him. and her. in the end, i went to the door to tell her goodbye. she came outside with the INQUISITION.. why am i leaving? why did i come over? (DUH!!!! my fcking car, why else would i drive 30 plus miles in horrific construction and weekend traffic!) he lies to her. (none of my business) did he invite me to dinner with his family? (uh, no... he's was trying to earn some quick cash to buy some more groceries, which you just managed to fck up!) you do understand where i'm coming from? (bitch please and hell to da naw. i am very involved with someone else. and he's told you who it is so YOUAREREALLYTRIPPING!) you can stay for dinner if you want. (uh, and not get my car fixed?) the whole scene was pathetic and disheartening.
as i got into my car, i didn't worry if i'd make it back home. i had let go of things i couldn't control, and had faith that someone, like always, would be there. i hoped that she too would learn to let go. for her own sanity and self esteem. the look in his eyes and the far away tone in his voice screamed this was the last straw. he treated me like a little sister. looked out for me, cuz, as he says i needed a real brother and not a bunch of "poets and suits" in my life. i felt bad, 'cuz the brother was always on the grind. not an illegal hustle to bring heat to her block, let alone her home. took care of his little girl, hell i've seen him leave cars on blocks with a bunch of n---s cursing to go pick her up from daycare...... he's done the same with her, picking her up from work, when she had a car and was able to drive herself back and forth. he flirted and talked dirty around his boys, like any man... but i never saw or heard the dog in him... and believe me, i'd seen sisters throwing themselves at him to get a "discount" on their car repairs. then, i wondered...when will she realize that she's not expressing love, but a desire to possess. and that you can never hold onto anything that long or that strong without suffocating it.....