Turn and face the Stranger... Changes.... Time May Change Me, But I Can't Trace Time

I still don't know what I was waiting for
And my time was running wild
A million dead-end streets
Every time I thought I'd got it made
It seemed the taste was not so sweet
So I turned myself to face me
But I've never caught a glimpse
Of how the others must see the faker
I'm much too fast to take that test
David Bowie... Changes
I am working on self. Trying to be patient and understanding of others. Trying to hold my tongue. Tame my wild thoughts. Be supportive without criticism. Settle my tone a bit. Think before I speak. Respond, not react. Reaffirming, yet fair. (Well I'm always a fair jury, but not for judgmental reasons). Become more spiritual. Be committed to someone and something other then myself. Get another job. Stop hatin' on Jill (I don't think her book is that great.. SEEN A HELL OF A LOT BETTER CHAPBOOKS SOLD OUT OF BACKPACKS.....I know I'm not hatin' just concerned.....)Complete one fcking poetry project by the end of the year. Sell my house (2muchspace2muchwork2lonely). Take the time to get to know the people who call ME friend. (Can u believe that shyt, they call me friend?)Be a better friend to those who call ME friend. (Shed the fcking loner coat, it's starting to be heavy and 2 fcking hot.)
While I believe the way I've always been has not been a real issue, it has been. It's causing me discomfort in areas I thought would never, could never be impacted.. That it was only in select situations did I use the coat of arms... I now know it can get me where it really hurts.... They say pain is a great motivator, so I am trying desperately to avoid it... So perhaps the change is pain avoidance, or because I have a high tolerance for pain...
sidebar: I tore my acl and some cartilage in my right knee four years ago. I continued to run as I awaited surgery which I pushed back 8 months to complete my assigned audits (no one would say they did my work!!!!). Anyway for 4 1/2 months I continued to run bleachers at the high school near my apartment. My doctor stated she did not understand why it appeared as if my knee cap was moved an 1/4 inch to the left. I told her I had continued to exercise to shed weight as I anticipated I would gain more during the recuperation period. I reassured her it was okay, I was running the visitor's side. She asked why that was relevant. I explained to her that the visitor side was not as lengthy and large as the home side!!! Needless to say she was not happy. In other words I can mask pain, well...
back to the point...
I think it's time I moved into the new millennium. So, to commemorate my new self, I am going to celebrate... No I do not want AREAS which you believe need improvement... Just some ways to celebrate.... Please post suggestions, as I am planning a CHANGETHE13 festival in the upcoming weeks.....
13andtheysayitain'tlucky....