thanks a lot.

01) g.o.d. for the direction i am continuing to be pushed in.... it is definitely good and orderly.

02) for having friends to miss. it was good seeing the two of you last night, even if we weren't sitting together talking. i'm getting fat so we have to lay off the chicken.

03) for hearing the excitement in your voice as you talk about the opportunities and experiences you've had over the last few months. i am soooooo happy for you, afro and all.

04) for a ride to killeen with an "old" friend. thank g.o.d. we never miss a beat or lose a single minute when we are apart.

05) for personal growth. i could never experience and learn from this moment without it.

06) for those beautifully strong penny colored hands that g.o.d. that have learned to hold me when i need them most.

07) for fear, it keeps me one step ahead of the race.

08) for love of family and friends that keep me in the race.

09) the ability to read the and in between the lines. what a clear story!

10) my sister.... if i could be born tomorrow, i would pick her as my mother.

11) mary... her new shoes look good....

12) the recipe. i'm looking forward to it.

13) an idea shared with a true friend. i wonder if it could be a reality!

bonus.... continuing to live by the book of angie.... it's been hella fun!

Crown Royal on Ice.....

Angie, Jill, ME(CHEEZING!), and THE Diva E

I was just thinking about......

Yes.... Sorry. New picture. Will post the one we took with her soon.... Yes...

What You Know 'Bout Me! One Down One To Go!

CONGRATULATIONS TO THE WORLD CHAMPION RED SOX

Manny and David

Thankfully Taking a Page out of the Book of Angie...

01) The opportunity to stand DIRECTLY in front of Jill Scott during the invitation only concert in Houston last night.
02) Getting there early enough to hear the sound check, and watching Jill walk directly past me. As she walked through us, she said "hello."
03) Getting extra tickets and drinking the hell out of the Carmel Appletini's.
04) Getting a copy of the show's playlist.
05) Our third year seeing Jillio together.... Our FIRST TRUE DATE WAS A JILL SCOTT CONCERT.
06) Okay.... it get's better...Getting a VIP PASS to hang out with JILL AND HER BAND.
07) Only better... A PHOTO WITH JILL to be published in Envy Magazine.
08) BETTER THAN EVER... Reminded her that I saw her in Dallas before the National Poetry Slam. She asked how'd we do, and then get this, she said, "that's right I told you to get them with your words and not performance." she did remember. SHE PROBABLY SAYS THAT TO ALL THE POETS BUT SHE SAID IT TO ME LAST NIGHT.
09) Hanging with angie, and listening to her crack up dang near the entire lobby before the show.
10) Making it there and back safely!
11) A new poem, and a new one memorized.
13) G.O.D. because without it, well, to live without it is truly tragic.

BONUS: For G.O.D., ELM and Angie making sure I got to realize YET ANOTHER dream....

COLOR CHANGE

IN HONOR OF THE RED SOX and THE NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS! Colors will change after WE WIN THE WORLD SERIES AND THE SUPERBOWL!!!!!!!

Just SOME Thoughts

Okay so, last night I was doing some research for a poem. I needed to look up the passage in Revelations regarding Jesus's re-appearance. For those unfamiliar with the Bible, remember the motion picture Malcolm X? If you do, think of the scene while in he was in prison and was referred to as Satan.

Any who... I won't go into the discussion regarding his color, however, if we were to consider his birth land. And we know Africa is the birth of all civilization? So... if nothing else, we know he's not AMERICAN.

Most argue that the text used to justify that he is in fact black fails to consider that after woolly there is a reference to his hair being as white as snow. And when discussing his feet as bronze, most fail to include that there is a reference to "burning" which some argue that they could have been burned "white" as in most metals and coal tend to do. So my question is why couldn't he had been an brother who's hair turned gray? And maybe he was a little ashy? Okay the ashy part may or may not be funny depending on how you live your life.

I mean think about what your mom or grandmother would tell you about her gray hair? That it either came from you or wisdom. And if Jesus lived and died for all of our sins, well.... wouldn't his hair be a little gray? I mean, if I think about the worry that I possibly cause him. What would the weight of the world do?

I'm just saying. Now mind you this is not anything to say Jesus is black, white, green, or blue. I mean, believe in what you believe in as long as it gives you: peace, hope, and a reason to live accordingly. You know?

But I thought it was worth a chuckle.

Additionally I began to think about why people turn to G.O.D. when they become older, and it has nothing to do with preparing to die or trying to make peace with G.O.D. I think it's just we get tired of listening to and following our own or others bad advice, and we simply look for answers outside ourselves. That quest becomes spiritual, and in some people it leads them back or to Church. I was reared in the Church. Matter of fact, we were in Church so much we PLAYED CHURCH. How do you play church? You mimic church members, the choir and the Pastor. You already know who I was, 'cuz I am who I am.. either the Pastor or the woman who got happy. HAHAHAHAHA...

Yea okay. Too much information....

salama....

HATE ON US HATERS.. NOW OR LATER!

You know, the media's crying because Brady and the Pats ran up the score. My response to that.. Learn how to PLAY THE GAME!

And to keep it strictly MASSACHUSETTS... The SOX ARE IN THE SERIES.... THE YANKEES SUCK ROCKS!

No, I am not from New England, but I do so want to retire there... I've loved that part of the world all my life.... And to all the JUMP ON THE WAGON COLT and COLORADO ROCKIES fans... BRING IT ON!

The Bastardization of Poetry

I wish...
we could go back to the words,
"in the beginning".
before claps, snaps, ohh's, awes and applause.
when the mic
was simply
a release,
a vessel,
an alter,
in which to sacrifice our sorrows.
when poetry was a testament to life,
a gift from the g.o.d.s
and the answers were sought NOT in how you moved the crowd,
but how you humbly allowed the crowd to move you.
emotions tumbled from your lips
clinging desperately onto the ears of the person who needed it the most.
i want to go back before rewinds, stop watches, and time penalties.
before the construction of ego's tore down what our soul feasted upon.

Just Plain Grateful.

01) Thank G.O.D. for the gift of clarity. I can see so much right now, and am definitely feeling the view.
02) For the realization that I have grown past a lot of past hurt, pain and resentments. I can't choke or burn and I am REALLY OKAY with it.
03) Haiku's. Even if I'm the only one who gets them. They made me laugh.
04) Which wich and catching up. Thanks for always being beautifully you. And you do it so well. I can call you sister forever. And the sleeve is ABSOfckingLUTELY HOT!
05) For refocusing and redirecting. And you know what? I am SO STILL IN LOVE WITH YOU!
06) Fingers in locks, fingers interlocked.
07) Beautiful brown eyes that smile when you talk.
08) No matter what the hell goes on around me, I got my eyes on the prize. ME, YOU and OUR FUTURE.
09) For my middle finding the love she truly deserves.
10) For my "niece" finding the strength we all knew she had.
11) For the surprise invitation. Thanks for helping us keep a tradition.
12) Beautiful music created upon the winds of change. May I continue to be an instrument.
13) g.o.d.

favorite time of the year!!!!!

a leaf fell on my head today!

thanks through musical expression!

01) Songs in the Key of Life (Stevie Wonder 1976)

02) Off The Wall (Michael Jackson 1979)

03) 1999 (Prince 1983)

04) Cookie: The Anthropological Mixtape (Me'shell Ndegeocello 2002)

05) Street Songs (Rick James 1981)

06) Maxwell's Urban Hang Suite (Maxwell 1996)

07) Soul Catcher (Olu 1999)

08) Wild Seed Wild Flower (Dionne Farris 1994)

09) Love Jones Soundtrack (Various Artists 1997)

10) AmeriKKKa's Most Wanted (Ice Cube 1990)

11) The Chronic (Dr. Dre 1992)

12) Who Is Jill Scott: Words and Sounds Volume 1 (Jill Scott 2000)

13) Baduism (Erykah Badu 1997)

Extra Special Bonus (Red Star Sounds Vol. 1 Various Artist 2001 and The Song Lives On Joe Sample and Lalah Hathaway 1999)

If you know the cd's then you know why.....

reports

Kim Rose's John....
I prayed for a week.
simply dropped to my knees,
in utter defeat,
unable to speak.
unable to rescue
my fleeting sanity
fading into
a sea of voices
I did not recognize
as my own.
or if they were,
I simply could not
muster the strength to control
them.
reality’s been grappling
my weakened conscious.
and night mare’s have
seized my waking hours.
a month ago
the moon handcuffed the sun,
imprisoned the moon
and barred the stars.
I’m lost in eternal darkness.
wandering
in grayed confusion,
cloaked in my subconscious oblivion.
last night the weight of the clouds,
cracked the earth’s surface,
and my world,
came tumbling down upon me
one after one painful mistake
at a time.
gathering what I could,
slicing hands,
palming pasts,
i thrust bloodied
jagged memories into
my pocket
hoping to g.o.d
that on the day we meet
he would provided the
good ones,
the missing ones...
which never allowed me to feel complete.
once searching for desperate comfort
I grasp the tail of a comet
flying over head.
but
the cold burn didn’t allow me
to hold on.
unable to withstand
the heat,
the rush,
or the pressure.
I simply let go.
however,
I can never forget the taste of
heaven’s due,
the breeze of fluttering angel’s wings,
and the warmth of happiness's glow
which rushed through me like
sand from a cracked hour glass.
we're unable to capture this moment
or this lifetime.
so I continue to search,
with my head hung low,
hunched back,
insecure gape,
mumbling undecipherable mantras
my eyes pushed upward,
rolled in my head,
seeing my thoughts
before they're spoken.
insanity is stalking my reason
and like a jealous lover,
it’s peeking ‘round corners,
hiding in the shadows.
making accusations,
arousing suspicion
frequently calling,
panting heavily into phone lines
I don’t have.
and i can't stop the mysterious
ringing hysterically in my ears,
even after I answer.
I feel its death's breaths
slipping through my fingers.
So I force my hands deep
into my jean pockets
hoping to suffocate them.
my booking papers in the right,
my hands
frantically clinging
to the lint and thread in the left.
you see,
that’s all that’s holding me together.
my jeans are holier than any biblical texts
as they recite the beatitudes with each step...
blessed are the poor in spirit
they scream..
I can feel the cool of
your judgment chill my bones.
and for a moment,
I silence the voices
sliding down my cheeks,
as I fall to my knees,
hear the snap of the break.
I prayed for a week
until they found me.
man made halo,
six feet in length
quarter inch knot.
my mind the alter
my body the sacrifice
g.o.d i offer myself to thee
and the voices cried upon the wind
"I will rescue him; I will protect him."


kdtaylor, 2007
section 8 coffee publications
all rights reserved

My coworker and best buddy (we now share an office space)had an assignment to read the death reports of persons who committed suicide this past quarter. The deceased were recent releases from state funded mental health programs. one evening after work, she cried as she read me an autopsy report. she then looked over and asked me to write a poem. this was a difficult one as it hit a little too close to home. currently it's just in the just finished phase, no re-write, no clean up. like me in this moment, the piece is raw....

Kindred Women

Beloved, you are my sister, you are my daughter, you are my face; you are me. Toni Morrison

As a woman, particularly a woman of color, I have, like so many others had difficulty developing friendships with women. I don't mean casual relationships, but true life-long relationships based upon mutual honesty, respect and trust.

We've all had negative experiences since childhood ranging from African American/black culture taboos relating to the texture of our hair, color complexities, standards of beauty, popularity and intelligence. Often, we were "pitted" against one another because there seemed to never be enough. And as we grew older experiences with lovers and job opportunities would further deepen our infectious wombs. However, we seldom if ever made a conscious effort to look inward toward our problems.

I had a sister friend a few years ago who often exclaimed "I don't do women." All the while professing that I was one of her closet friends. As the years progressed, I realized that Kenya did not only, not do women; she did not DO HERSELF. It is not my desire to complete a moral inventory upon her; however, the sister had major father, esteem, and social issues, SQUARED! She preferred to date African or Caribbean men. Who, she believed, represented the "epitome" of a man. "They have not been emasculated and molded into a submissively weak sky-blue (mixture of blue and white) collar wearing thuggish wannabe by the American culture, media, socialization, and politics," she would say over and over again. An idea I could agree with in some ways. Kenya also believed every woman who wore their hair in the natural state was an embarrassment. Mind you, I discussed in great detail my decision to transition from chemicals to natural hair styles with her almost daily. She believed every bi or lesbian female wanted to be with her and every heterosexual female in the office wanted to be her or hated on her. That most of the men in the office were her friends, because they simply "understood" her and knew that she was woman of substance. Not like those 'hoes in the office that wanted to gossip about her because they were all so close. Needless to say her exclamation, "I don't do women" became my reality. There were no other issues: 1) I didn't want her. 2) Didn't want to be her. 3) Wasn't jealous of her. 4) Didn't want to be her man. 5) Was supportive and encouraging in all of her dreams and desires. and 6) Didn't disclose her "business" . In other words, I was a friend. Even when she wasn't a friend to me. In the end, she would no longer "do me" behind of all things, a vaccuum cleaner. However, I was mature enough to recognize, that I was a sister friend who brought little if any conflict or drama. That proved to be too much.

Kenya is one of many cautionary tales. We've all been there. The most recent occurred in my office with a woman (un)affectionately known as (ICE) Princess. The Ice Princess shared many of Kenya's characteristics. Like Kenya, I had no desire to be friend with her, I was simply corgial. And my politeness rolled into frequent conversation and, once again, I wandered aimlessly into the well known land of "I Don't Do Women" acquaintanceship. In this case, I decided to keep it pretty simple, and it would never, in any way go beyond the office and business trips. Which worked until I got a promotion. The one she didn't want.

My developmental years were spent with my Great Grand. When you are reared by old people you learn a lot, fast. One of which is who you are. Not may people can say they had a relationship, let alone spent the first eleven years of their life with a Great Grand parent. Secondly, when you are able to hear first hand the TRUE STRUGGLE of our people. My Great Grand and her siblings were people who were able to corroborate my history and government class readings, even the two weeks of "black history" I received every February. The only time you learned about your history if you were reared in the "Southern Slave" states. They were all slave States. I also learned about the brutality and it's impact upon the black family which is the root of our economic and social issues. I digress. I learned quickly not to carry unnecessarty shame, because you know what real shame is. You learn to be comfortable with who you are REGARDLESS of sexual orientation, socio-economic status, level of education, and believe it or not looks. It's what you receive during those developmental years that makes or breaks you as a woman.

I've had friends throughout my life who were taught that make up, hair, clothes and shoes made them beautiful. These are the same women who would not be caught without some horse's tail hanging from their heads, along with half the MAC counter all the while not purchasing their children clothes and other essentials. Or they are planting that same poisonous seed in their child's mind. Let me tell you this, my ass is ALWAYS FLY in my gay white man t-shirts or button downs, blue jeans and matching sandals or flip flops. Let me re-iterate, my ass is always fly. I'm not trying to compete with another sister. My standard of beauty is what have I looked like when I felt the most beautiful? I've peeped Nikki's pics, she's a beautiful woman. Eb is cute as she can be with her little Chocolate Stassney Barbie Butt. Angel is rocking the hell out of her 'fro and cute ass outfits. Shelle is beautiful with her curly locks. Joey got the Kotalian thing on lock. My girl does her thing with each and every one of her color choices in hair and clothes. Tee Tee with her beautiful locks and colorful tattoo sleeve. And I could go on and on..

I say all of this because I had a card/domino party at the house on Saturday night. There were women from all walks of like. A New York Puerto Rican who works like a Jamaican. A Caucasian sister who loves nothing but chocolate. A beautiful bi-racial sister who embraces both her cultures. A sister who prolly lives more of a white experience than any white woman I know. There were natural little 'fros, locks, weaves, braids, perms, dyed blondes with black roots. And we had FUN!!! We talked, ate, talked shit, laughed and most of all learned. And it was a wonderful experience.

Thank G.O.D. I am learning to not only do women, but be a woman, contiue to appreciate the beauty of our differences and trust women. Because I am a beautiful, trustworthy woman who can embrace the spectrum of our difference and never for one second QUESTION WHO I AM.

until we meet again. salama...

Gratitude For What The Years have Taught Me

01) Grateful that i don't have to go next door or down the street to borrow a cup of sugar or a stick of butter from Miss So and So.

02) Grateful that i don't have to clutch a "gently borrowed aka stolen from my aunt" brown food stamp (the equivalent of a dollar bill) to buy ten pieces of penny candy to get coin change for the candy lady. (Don't act like I was the only one! Besides her candy was cheaper. And if you're talking about the food stamp, you know you had them either way, cuz your grandmother or momma always wanted to help out Miss Such and Such!)

03) Grateful that i don't have to hear the crunch of thick plastic or feel the sticky sweat dripping down the back of my legs when i stand up after sitting on my sofa. (Don't act like I was the only one!)

04) Grateful that i don't have to go outside and "hose down" the chiller system to cool my house. a chiller system/water cooler was a form of air conditioning, you had to run water over the coils when they dried.

05) Grateful that i don't have to go down the street to the candy lady for a strawberry ice cup, 'cuz i didn't have enough money for the snow cone truck.

06) Grateful that when i did have enough money for the snow cone truck, i don't have to get a cherry twin popsicle and share with my cousin 'cuz he didn't have any money.

07) Grateful that i don't have to get used Levi Garrett snuff placed on wasp stings, "dog mange" in my hair or some other homemade concoction placed anywhere near my body when I don't feel well. (Don't act like it was just me!)

08) Grateful that i don't have to go inside when the street lights come on.

09) Grateful that i don't have to sit still like a little lady when i dress up.

10) Grateful that i don't have to sit on the hard floor for what seemed like forever getting my hair braided or pressed every saturday night.

11) Grateful that i don't have to close the refrigerator door 'cuz "the content ain't gone talk no time soon and they're not gonna change no matter how long you stare at it!".

12) Grateful that if i want a hamburger, it don't have to have a home made one on toasted wonder bread with the crust torn off! (Don't act like i was the only one!)

13) Grateful I don't have to come in the other room to change the channel, get a glass of water, or bring me_____, a million times when my favorite show was on tv!

BONUS: Grateful that i don't have to hear, "you need to go in there and study, you don't have the hands or the body to do any hard work, and you to damn scary to be a criminal."

EXTRA BONUS: Grateful that i don't have to eat government grilled cheese sandwiches or that oily ass peanut butter on crackers for snacks while sitting on the floor at my cousin's watching project terror. (don't act like that grilled cheese wasn't good!)

SPECIAL EXTRA BONUS: Grateful that in Elementary School when the Wiseman twins and their friends wanted to beat up Ronnie and Leslie Johnson on the way home after school, I saw the first can come flying down the hill and heard the bottle break in the middle of the street. It was the beginning of an illustrious career through high school as a sprinter. I became one of the fastest runners in our neighborhood and at the time of graduation I was ranked 6th in class 5A (big schools) hurdles and a member of 400 and 800 meter relays both top 10 in the Great State of Texas BABY! No I went to college for volleyball and academics (that not working hard thing stuck!)

I loved my childhood. No matter how difficult or painful it may have been at times. I lost so many family members because I grew up with my great grand and her siblings from age five to eleven. I was always around old people and oh my gosh the wealth of knowledge and pride you obtain from that experience. After my great grand died, I couldn't wait to be an adult because my childhood just wasn't the same.. I am eternally grateful for these bitter sweet lessons of gratitude. I'm happy that I don't have to do these things anymore. I was a good student and I paid attention to my village's lessons. But man these are some DAMN good memories. They taught me so much about life. I guess what I am most thankful for today is: my great grand, grand, and aunts who taught me to want and to do better! And my mother's memory, Mom, just can't bear to let you or the name you so thoughtfully gave me down. Today I pray that anyone who reads this or shares it with another human being embraces their past, and makes a commitment to just do and be better.

'til we meet again. salama.

last gratitude of September 2007

When you can't find your own, you use someone else's. Gratitude from the good book and others....

I fell once, will do so again, thanks for the strength and fortitude to get the F' up!

01) If the home is deserving, let your peace rest on it; if it is not, let your peace return to you. Mathew 10:13. Thanks, for allowing the peace to return.

02) Shake off your dust; rise up, sit enthroned, O Jerusalem. Free yourself from the chains on your neck, O captive Daughter of Zion. Isaiah 52:2. Thanks for the cleansing. I feel lighter.

03) I thought to myself, "Look, I have grown and increased in wisdom more than anyone who has ruled over Jerusalem before me; I have experienced much of wisdom and knowledge." Then I applied myself to the understanding of wisdom, and also of madness and folly, but I learned that this, too, is a chasing after the wind. Ecclesiastes 1:16-17. I will never understand everything in it's entirety, and trying to do so will drive me insane. It simply cannot be done. And that's perfectly okay.

04) Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work Ecclesiastes 4:9. Love ya much.

05) If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up. Ecclesiastes 4:10 Thanks for calling me friend. Thanks for letting me know I am never alone.

06) Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies. Psalms 34:13. What a good time I'm having staying in my own lane.

07) I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the LORD sustains me. Psalms 3:5. Thanks for every breath, every step.

08) Listen, O heavens, and I will speak; hear, O earth, the words of my mouth. Deuteronomy 32:1. Thank G.O.D. for Thursdays and Poetry.

09) Remember the days of old; consider the generations long past.... Deuteronomy 32:7. My Village and those we've lost this September.

10) Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. Dalai Lama taking control of my life this month has never been so rewarding.

11) "You can't think how I depend on you, and when you're not there the color goes out of my life." Victoria Woolf My sister and I turning another corner, strengthening our bond. As great Grand always said, "in the end, you're all I have." It doesn't hurt that I have the best niece and nephew in the whole world!

12) "After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music." Aldous Huxley thank u crown royal on ice for the sneak peak! thank you for the cd surprise! my little green monster.... yes angel, how the hell did I go witout one for soooooo lonnnnggggg.

13) There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. Albert Einstein G.O.D. family and friends, thanks for being patient and kind as I continue to move toward clarity.

As Angie Says THE FREENESS!

You can listen to Jagged Edge (HOT!!!), yet an exceptionally short CD (38.5 minutes or so) as well as Keisha Cole on BET transmissions and listen up.

Jill Scott The Real Thing: Words and Sounds Volume 3

By now, every sister who believes she has a multitude of frenemies has banged the "sister with an attitude anthem of the summer" Hate on Me, by multi platinum performance artist extraordinaire Jill Scott. I wasn't exceptionally impressed with the song, but I needed Jill to give me something, after the dismal and disappointing, Collaborations released last Spring. Hate on Me, is simply a catchy play ground tune, and pales in comparison to the third installment of her Words and Sounds series.

The Real Thing: Words and Sounds Volume 3, is an excursion into a poet, singer, songwriter's soul, innermost beauty, and painful break-up with husband Lyzel Williams. I have not been moved by a collection of emotions on a single album, since Me shell N'degeOcello's Bitter.

The intro, Let It Be, gives us a sample of the beauty and strength of her voice. As a poet we all know retorts, "she feels trapped in a box", Jill, too, proclaims she and her music are universal, and to just ".. whatever it is, let it be."

The melodic rock influenced mid-tempo title track, The Real Thing, is fantastic, ".... when you're lost, and need some focus. Come see me." Although she sells herself short with some lines "like Cleopatra Jones, I can set your straight" the song in itself is really good.

But, when she gets into what she does best, ballads. You want more. Come See Me, My Love, How's It Make You Feel, Insomnia, and Whenever You're Around we find Jill at her best, vulnerable and honest. And every woman's questionable desire "Wanna Be Loved" is a smooth request.

How's it Make You Feel, should clearly be a sister's mantra. Questioning every person who takes black women for granted. She questions "how would if feel if every black female in the world disappears..... No brown sugar on your cocoa." Hauntingly beautiful and moving. She doesn't provide answers, just questions.

On Epiphany, we find her sultry clear voice, rapping to a what appears to be a ?uestlove drum beat, with a nice riff in the back ground. Her voice, pure and sensual. Pay attention to the words, as it is true poetry. Would love a remix with the Roots or Common. Crown Royal, along the same lines, has a smooth beat, very poetic. Both songs are equally erotic, if you are able to follow the words. Excellent word play.

As usual, there are a couple of bonus tracks. Look for Imagination/Crown Royal Suite.

For those of us that have been thirsty for TRUE JILL, this is a must have. She has matured as an artist and as a woman. We are able to experience true artistic emotion void of radio catch phrases, vulgarity, and insulting sexual visuals. Instead, we find Neo-Soul at it's best, lyrically rhythmical. You won't find this music on the radio. As a matter of fact, true fans will be GRATEFUL that she does not get any air play, as it would be an insult to sandwich her between "Crank Dat" and "Bed".

Jill Scott, along with Queen Latifah aka Dana Owens's Trav'lin' Light a second foray into the realm of jazz, soul, and blues as well as the incomparable Me shell N'degeOcello's The World Has Made Me the Man of My Dreams will all be released on September 25, 2007. Go out and support the sisters.

Check out VH1.com's The Leak to listen to The Real thing: Words and Sounds Volume 3, in it's entirety.

Friday

Last night was fanfingtastic. ALOT of good new poetry. Angel you missed baby girl's new piece. It was fiyah! I was PROUD for both of us. Sandbloom was great! I'm holla'ing at you Baby Boy, "CROWN ROYAL ON ICE!!!!"

Thankful on a Thursday? How about a hell ya!

This has been probably one of the most HEALING SEPTEMBERS EVER! And I'm topping it off with a card and domino party at the end of the month. It's all women for a couple of reasons, most important:
01) Celebrating our sameness and differences
02) And of course my Village.

Anyway, yesterday we went to San Antonio to visit my grandfather. It was soooooooo f'ing cool. As I've grown up (significantly this last year) I recognize the importance of roots. Often I act as if I don't have or want any. I do. And I've found it out more this year as I've moved past my hurt and self loathing. (A year ago, I would have never admitted that!) Anyway, my Grandfather met ELM and they literally talked damn near all afternoon. My aunt, my mother's younger sister, now resides in my Grand's home/my childhood home. She's made changes, yet it had the same feel, and we talked about my Grand for hours. That was healing in itself. I mean, I had people who KNEW her to talk to. We laughed, swallowed tears, and just fcking remembered. And for the first time in a long time, it hurt good. Don't get me wrong, I STILL MISS MY GRAND. But it was different. I had all types of strange dreams about her and the house last night, AND I didn't wake up sad or indifferent. I woke up feeling like I missed her, and she was just a whisper away.

I had dinner with the Fellowship of the Wangs last evening, and that, well, it was what is always is: A FCKING BLAST. Man, I truly love the way you guys love me and all my BULLSH..... Thanks for everything each and every time. I truly appreciate how you're always willing to keep me honest. EVEN WHEN I SWEAR I ALREADY AM. You just make me see things in a different light.

Not like everything is coming up roses in my life. I still get pricked, yet, it doesn't stop me from picking 'em.

So, thus far my lessons of September 2007..

01) ELM (and the Twig) - Do not press me to leave you or to turn back from following you. Where you go, I will go; where you lodge I will lodge; your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die, I will die — there will I be buried. May the Lord do thus and so to me, and more as well, if even death parts me from you.”

02) STINK (my younger sister, niece and nephew) - For there is no friend like a sister, in calm or stormy weather, to cheer one on the tedious way, to fetch one if one goes astray, to lift one if one totters down, to strengthen whilst one stands.

03) Angel/Chucks-Veedubs/Copa/Eb/Joey/Mo/TeeTee - Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born. You guys already know individually and collectively I have worked f'ing hard to make sure that we would always be cool, and I'm glad that nothing changed, you trusted my word and i trusted yours. and in some cases, when things look f'd up, we came to each other to make sure there'd never be any misunderstandings.

04) Brian/Chelle/Sarah - God will have a humble people. Either we can choose to be humble or we can be compelled to be humble. . . . We can choose to humble ourselves by conquering enmity toward our brothers and sisters, esteeming them as ourselves, and lifting them as high or higher than we are. (I am now humble. And I pray that one day we can rebuild, I have moved past my offenses, and pray that I can be forgiven for mine.)

05) June/Herman - Cherish your visions and your dreams, as they are the children of your soul; the blueprints of your ultimate achievements. (thank you for helping me find myself!)

06) my village - A hundred men may make an encampment, but it takes a woman to make a home. (you may not be here, but you're always in my heart....)

these are prolly the most significant lessons, since these are the people most are familiar with. I included my sister, because every once in a while she reads my blog, and I don;t want her to think anything, even though I know she won't. just covering my ass.